Sunday, January 1, 2012

To-Do List for the Newly Widowed


Cry.
Cry.
Cry.
Conduct the business
of carrying on without him.
Wear black
Deny.
Deny.
Deny.
Scream.
Vomit.
Listen to well-meaning strangers
say inane things like,
"Happy New Year!"
and
"Have a nice day!"
Try with all your might
not to punch them.
Sigh.
Sigh.
Sigh.
Cry.
Cry.
Cry.
Left foot.
Right foot.
Left foot.
Right foot.
Breathe.

9 comments:

Robin Thomas said...

This is very powerful, and raw.

Thank you.

sweetheartville said...

I am so very sorry for your loss.

Penny said...

My heart hurts for you, honey! I pray for your peace and comfort every day.

Medeah said...

The longer I sit here trying to decide what to type the more I realize that there are no words to ease your pain. I will pray you are carried through this darkness by God's grace. Sending you love.

vintage girl at heart said...

So very sorry for your loss...I love your in lieu of flowers below...what a loving way to remember someone by spreading Love.
You and your li'l sweetie will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Suz said...

I am so sorry. We just lost our best friend to multiple myeloma last week. Right now, my husband and I are at the Mayo Clinic and he is in the final stages of Pancreatic Cancer. I saw your entry on Robin's blog and had to come right away. I am doing a little "pre-grieving" but I know that nothing is like the real thing."
We also are Congregationalists in Minneapolis.
Fondly,
Suz

Francy said...

I like the "try not to punch them"

People say such stupid, un thought about things. I now try to be more thoughtful befor I speak.

Sorry to read of your loss.....love the advise.

A bird in the hand said...

My heart is with you even though I don't know you. I have been through the same thing, and your list is spot-on.

You will survive but you must take the time to grieve, and I will personally smack anyone who tells you after a few months that you should be "over it." You'll never be over it, but you will learn how to live with it, because truly the terrible pain will slowly recede with time.

Colette (friend of Robin)
xoxo

Suz said...

Thank you so much for responding, Kimberlee. we are now entering the really final stages. I love what you wrote! I will be back!!!
Hugs,
Suz